The trouble is with this life trap running we actually can’t see that what we expect is a little over the top. Or a lot!

If you are recognising yourself here’s a way to start to undo this pattern and manage an unrelenting to-do list:

1. Go through your list and give each item a stress score out of 10 with 10 being major meltdown material. Now, looking at the jobs that are over 5/10 stress – can you break any of them down into smaller jobs to cut down the stress?

2. Try to keep all jobs in a day under 5/10. Make sure that when you look at the day – from a time perspective – it still stays under 5/10 stress for you.

3. Schedule in no more than one item over 5/10 stress in a day. If you suffer from anxiety this is really important – those items over 5/10 are often the source of anxiety and panic.

4. Check out your day and then cut your jobs by half. Like packing for a holiday – we all know how hard that is but it does leave room for new purchases. This will leave room for those unexpected happenings or maybe even stopping to eat lunch!

5. Keep this up for several weeks before upping the ante. None of the “yup, I can do that now, let’s do more” during the second week of this…. not only does it takes about 6 weeks to learn a new habit (the habit of reasonableness here!) but there can be other lifetraps fueling this need to keep on doing, for example fear of rejection or not pleasing others.

This tale has been retold many, many times like any good folktale.
Here are a couple of versions….

A man named Sei Weng owned a beautiful mare which was praised far and wide. One day this beautiful horse disappeared. The people of his village offered sympathy to Sei Weng for his great misfortune. Sei Weng said simply, “That’s the way it is.”

A few days later the lost mare returned, followed by a beautiful wild stallion. The village congratulated Sei Weng for his good fortune. He said, “That’s the way it is.”

Some time later, Sei Weng’s only son, while riding the stallion, fell off and broke his leg. The village people once again expressed their sympathy at Sei Weng’s misfortune. Sei Weng again said, “That’s the way it is.”

Soon thereafter, war broke out and all the young men of the village except Sei Weng’s lame son were drafted and were killed in battle. The village people were amazed as Sei Weng’s good luck. His son was the only young man left alive in the village. But Sei Weng kept his same attitude: despite all the turmoil, gains and losses, he gave the same reply, “That’s the way it is.”

Chin-Ning Chu, in “The Asian Mind Game: unlocking the hidden agenda of the Asian business culture — a westerner’s survival manual,” New York:Macmillan Publishing Company(1991)

and another

A man who lived on the northern frontier of China was skilled in interpreting events. One day, for no reason, his horse ran away to the nomads across the border. Everyone tried to console him, but his father said, “What makes you so sure this isn’t a blessing?”

Some months later his horse returned, bringing a splendid nomad stallion. Everyone congratulated him, but his father said, “What makes you so sure this isn’t a disaster?”

Their household was richer by a fine horse, which his son loved to ride. One day he fell and broke his hip. Everyone tried to console him, but his father said, “What makes you so sure this isn’t a blessing?”

A year later the nomads came in force across the border, and every able-bodied man took his bow and went into battle. The Chinese frontiersmen lost nine of every ten men. Only because the son was lame did the father and son survive to take care of each other.

Truly, blessing turns to disaster, and disaster to blessing: the changes have no end, nor can the mystery be fathomed.

The Lost Horse, Chinese Folktale.
As told by Ellen J. Langer, in” The Power of Mindful Learning,” Reading, Mass: Addison-Wesley (1997).

This article was written by Gay Landeta with the intention of helping you to Create the Life you Want to Live! All rights reserved 2011.

I am alive!

I trust my energy and choose to follow my heart. I see through the mirage and joyful come to my senses embracing ‘what is’ and so become fully alive in the moment.

I laughed out loud when I made this! Made with the energy of the New Moon and coinciding with the start of the Year of the Dragon….

and if follows on so nicely from last months….

Freedom!

I am free to be me! I forgive my family, friends and loved ones of any perceived wrongs and have all the courage and strength I need to maintain my clarity and express all that I am.

For more info on the club have a look at http://gaylandeta.com.au/essence-of-the-month-club/

Have a great month, Gay

This mindfulness mediation helps us to learn the quality of the beginners mind, a place with clear perspective because it has no preconceived notions. It is both easy and very hard to achieve! So just play with the process.

Sit comfortably and look around you to find something that you are very comfortable with, something you have had for a long time. It may be an object or a piece of clothing or a piece or art or a plant, anything as long as it is very familiar.

Sit where you can see it. Close your eyes and open your Beginners Mind. Open your eyes and look at the object as if you have never seen it before. Imagine you are from another planet and this thing is a totally alien item. Do not judge it, just look at it and observe its qualities such as colours, shape, textures, shadows and light … Continue to reflect and consider what haven’t you noticed about this before?

Once you have completed this process you can consider how it would be to engage the quality of the Beginners Mind in every day life. How would life change? What would you see with new eyes instead of reacting to automatically?

Enjoy
Gay

This article was written by Gay Landeta with the intention of helping you to Create the Life you Want to Live! All rights reserved 2011.

Just a heads up!  Monday is the big New Moon of the year…. Doesn’t matter if you believe or not really, why not clarify what you want in your life and give it a shot!

(from Jan Spillers blog. For more see http://astrologywithjanspiller.com/2012/01/19/new-moon-reminder-monday-january-23-aquarius-239-am-est/

“…NEW MOON REMINDER… Monday, January 23, (5:39 pm Qld time), is the New Moon Power Day in January!  Don’t miss this opportunity to make wishes for goals you’d like to reach and experiences you’d like to have.

Because this New Moon is in the sign of AQUARIUS, it is the most potent New Moon of the year for wishes involving new beginnings in friendships and taking steps to make your larger, life goals and dreams come true.  Things you may have wanted to happen in your life for a long time can begin easily manifesting through using the boost of this friendly and intelligent New Moon.

For success, your wishes must be handwritten on paper and ten wishes maximum are allowed on each power day.  The most potent time is the first 8 hours AFTER the exact time of the New Moon; within the first 48 hours will still work.  The potency continues to exist for another twelve hours, but is weaker….”

So I reckon go for it, write down those wishes, burn them with the intent of manifestation and see what happens! Manifestation does seem pretty immediate at the moment, why not see what could happen….. (and watch out for what you ask for – it might happen!)

Enjoy! Gay

Is Laser Mentoring for you?

This program is for you if you have participated in the Marketing with Heart or Business Mentoring Program and want ongoing external support to keep you and your buisness growing.

Perhaps you have found that going it alone is just not producing the results you know you could be. You find yourself procrastinating, having difficulty focusing or just don’t know where to start. You need someone to help you prioritise and stay on track.

Maybe you have some great ideas but you need to get clarity on how to make them happen. You want someone to bounce ideas off, help you clarify any pitfalls and identify your next steps and you want it to remain completely confidential. You need someone trustworthy who is 100% for your success.

Perhaps you are looking for new ideas and you are concerned your business may be stagnating. You just get more creative talking to someone else. You need someone who knows you and your business and who talks the same language.

Or maybe your business is already in success mode but you know you can take it higher. You want long term support to keep you on your toes, you need someone you can work with to develop strategies and to hold your feet to the fire.

Why would you need it?

Entrepreneurs are renowned for being self sufficient and working things out on their own. Trouble is, like in any facet of our life, we just don’t know what we don’t know. And like in the rest of our life, this not knowing can hold us back from amazing results. Having someone who can fill in the gaps or help you identify the missing links is fundamental to long term success and growth.

In addition, working on your own can be very isolating. Partners or friends can be great, but we don’t want to rely on them for our business success. Having an external mentor who is committed to your success means that you have access to a whole different perspetive on your work.

Once you have found something that works you may as well stick to it! The Marketing with Heart Fast Track Program is just a great way of operating. If enables you to ethically and authentically offer your services to the world. The challenge is staying on track with it. You need someone who can keep reminding you of the foundations, keep you congruent with your values and help you to keep getting it right.

This program will suit you if you want ongoing support to stay on track to where you want your business to go.

What will Laser Mentoring do for you?

You will have someone to keep you accountable for your actions and to challenge you to grow, personally and professionally.Growing is always easier with support along the way. In addition to business strategies you have the transformative support of kinesiology at your call.

You will know you have someone you can talk to who understand the issues your business is facing. You will have already completed a business mentoring program with me, that means I already understand where your business is and where you want it to go. In addition, I know your personal ‘holes in the road’ and can help you avoid or heal them.

You don’t have to learn another new way of thinking. There is already so much on a business owners head, adding in learning new ways of thinking and doing when the old ways aren’t broken is just a waste of energy.  We already talk the same language.

Lastly, there is a reason that Olympic Athletes have a coach. Without someone to report to, challenge us and help us to find our blind spots we have no chance at the Gold.

In this program you will be supported as you continue to grow your business. Interested?

If you have worked with me call me! 0418 795 135.

or email me create@gaylandeta.com.au

If you haven’t then call me (or email me) anyway and get your free strategy session. We can have a chat and see if we are a match. If we are, I have several options that will give you the foundations you need to participate in this program and get the results you deserve.

I look forward to hearing from you!

Happy Year of the Dragon everyone! Another New Year opportunity to look at where you are and where you might like to head towards. This booster is one my Create your Year Workshop participants always love – Maori Drawing.

I published this as my first blog, go the this link for part one. Take your time and do the process.

Once you are complete go to part two. to discover what your subconscious is telling you. Many find much hidden gold in this process to use to inform your goals, intentions and growth for the year.

Enjoy!
Gay

This article was written by Gay Landeta with the intention of helping you to Create the Life you Want to Live! All rights reserved 2011.

…..great article from astrologer Richard Giles http://richardgiles.info on the upcoming Chinese New Year, it offers insights into the energy (from a Chinese perspective) of 2012 and an understanding of the customs of the Chinese New Year. Also insights into the Dragon personality!

New moons are the astrological opportunity to make 10 wishes (to manifest your intentions for the future), so mark Monday in your diary!

2012:  Year of The Water Dragon

The Year for Flying Through the Gates of Heaven

By Richard Giles

The Dragon is living up to its reputation. The Chinese New Year of 2012 begins very early on Monday January 23rd at the New Moon and is the beginning of the traditional Chinese calendar. The New Year begins another new zodiac animal cycle, the Year of the fearsome and heavenly Dragon. Chinese tradition employs both Solar and Lunar calendars and at the Solar calendar, its the 5th February but the New Moon day of 23rd January begins the official Lunar New Year celebrations.

The New Moon is at 6.40 pm (DST) in Australia and the Moon is at 3 degrees of Aquarius. The world time is 7.40 am (UT).

2011 was Year of the Metal Rabbit and what dramatic year we had!  Now in the cycle of the twelve comes the powerful and the winged creature of all the animals of the zodiac, the creative dynamic Dragon.  Its fitting that the year 2012 with all its attendant mythology and identification with the “end of the world” is ruled by the legendary Dragon whose reputation goes back through all cultures of the planet.

People born in the Dragon year are considered exceptional people who give their utmost to any situation to help move things along.  Ordinary daily life is often not their strong point – or if faced with ordinary situations they will try to transform them in such a way that they become extraordinary and even exhausting for everyone. Male and female dragons are often overpowering for the ordinary person to deal with and one can either be their friend or their rival, and being a friend is not always simple. Dragons see all and often speak the truth of a situation even though it doesn’t always go down well. They give great advice and will always offer worthwhile pointers to our life. Dragons are often very gifted and maintain they have the keys to all success and everything does seem to smile upon them. They do possess great intellectual wisdom to understand a situation, however, they don’t always act in a wise way. Some of their actions can be very impulsive. ..  (more next week)

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Chinese New Year Customs

Lucky money is given out in red envelopes with the family name and good-luck message written on them in gold. They are given on New Year by relatives, but, only to the unmarried as well as the children of the family.
The feast on New Year is always big for the first day of the year. If the New Year falls on the year of any particular animal the Chinese try not to eat that animal’s meat.

The first thing people do on Chinese New Year is offering ritual homage to one’s ancestors. It is then paid to the gods, followed by younger family members paying their respects to their living relatives.

New clothes are worn, and visits are made to friends, neighbours, and relatives to exchange good wishes of kung-hsi fa-tsai , which means “congratulations and prosperity.” As an occasion for reconciliation, it’s a time when old grudges are cast aside amidst an atmosphere of warmth and friendliness.

One of the most spectacular sights during the Chinese New Year Festival is the dragon and lion dance. The heads of these fearsome beasts are supposed to ward off evil, and the nimble movements of the dancers provide a grand spectacle enjoyable to everyone.

The second day of the Festival is the day that married daughters return to their parents’ home. If she is a newlywed, her husband must accompany her and bring gifts for her family.

The third day of the lunar New Year is the day when mice marry off their daughters. Thus, on that night, people are supposed to go to bed early so that the mice can perform their wedding ceremonies.

On the fourth day, the fervor begins to ebb. In the afternoon, people prepare offerings of food to welcome the return of the Kitchen God and his retinue from their trip to the Jade Emperor’s court. The Kitchen God’s return signifies the end of freedom from spiritual surveillance, “It’s never too early to send off the gods, and never too late to invite them back.”

Day five almost brings the Chinese New Year festivities to a close. All offerings are removed from the altars and life returns to normal.

Finally, on the ninth day, numerous offerings are set out in the forecourt or central courtyard of temples to celebrate the birthday of the Jade Emperor, who was believed to have been born immediately after midnight on the ninth day.

I have a confession to make. I have been suffering from inertia for a few weeks now.

I thought it was just end of year tiredness or boredom or something but I have to accept it is just old fashioned inertia. Can’t be stuffed. All I feel like doing is sleeping! True, I have had early mornings with puppy plus puppy responsibility on top of work so rest is welcome but I do have a couple of things that must get done and they haven’t been. Sleep keeps claiming me!

Don’t get me wrong, sleeping is great and with our super busy life often taking time out, doing nothing and just chilling is not only essential to our physical health but to our emotional and spiritual as well. But sometimes slowing down grinds us to a halt and our resistance to move seems insurmountable. Inertia takes over.

Inertia is not useful and is considered to be one of the 7 blocks on our spiritual path. It is a way we hide from our trueself. Being able to see what needs to happen – not what should, nor what we want but what NEEDS to happen  – and then taking action is fundamental to our growth.

But sometimes shifting forward feels almost impossible. Here are my top tips in identifying and overcoming the dreaded inertia. Work towards answering yes to each before proceeding to the next step. The process of doing so may well help you to find an edge to your comfort zone, something you could explore but haven’t yet had the impetus to do so. Choosing to do so will help you grow. Even if you choose not to you will at least ensure YOU are in charge not your comfort zone!

(I have assumed that you have some goals or intentions that you are not doing. If not you can go to my blog for this article on goal setting to create yours and THEN work through your inertia. Although you might find with the right goals your inertia disappears!)

1. Is this the ‘Right’ thing to do?

This is a fundamental question because we spend so much time doing what we ‘should’ or ‘ought’ to. ‘Should’ tends to take away our feelings of being in charge. Change it to you could do this and make sure you have a 100% commitment to it and to accepting the consequences that may arise from it.

Regardless of whether it is doing the dishes, writing an ezine, finishing an assignment or starting a meditation practice there are consequences for doing as well as not doing it. Sometimes what stops us is a lack of acceptance of the consequences. Think about both the positive and the negative; the loss of time and energy vs the clean house, the feeling of success, the connection to our deeper nature… all of these will have ramifications and may even ignite old issues that need to be resolved. Recognising these is often enough to shift them and open the door to moving forward.

It is also true that sometimes we just have an obligation to do something. By reconciling and accepting the consequences BEFORE committing we can avoid the feelings of resentment that so often make it difficult to enjoy a simple act of service for another.

In these cases, it is often the loss of time, energy or what we would rather be doing that we may resent. One way to avoid that is to make sure that what we are committing to is in alignment with our values. For example for a parent it may be the commitment to the value of health that spurs them to making a healthy dinner instead of resorting to Maccas, for me,  getting this eZine out (even if late!) is part of my commitment to my values of reliability and service. If you don’t know your values you check out my article to figure our your own personal values.

2. Is this the Right thing to do right now, is this your current priority?

Very often we get caught in red herrings and time wasting stuff that is really not important to do right now. Are we really doing the most important thing we need to do right now. Sometimes having a sleep really is the next most important thing but on other occasions it is just an avoidance of the necessary. Ensure that this really is the essential next thing to do by taking time to listen deeply.

3. Then give it a go and see how it feels…

Reaffirm to yourself why you are doing this and then make a commitment to do whatever it is for a period of time. Make it short if you are really caught in inertia, maybe 10 or 15 minutes.  Once you start how does it feel? Often once you get going the shift in the energy is often enough to carry you through to completion, on other occasions it still seems a major struggle.

If you are struggling it may not be yet in perfect Universal time. For example usually when I start the eZine it just writes itself. Other times I need to take a break and come back to it and when I do it flows once again. Do your best to work with the flow to prevent struggle but be aware inertia will slow you to begin with and put up a bit of a struggle of its own. Keep going long enough to know that any struggle is part of it not being the ‘right time’ as opposed to general inertia.

At this point if it is still not working then stop. Wait. Wait even longer. And then wait a little more. Wait past the ‘should’ and ‘ought to’ point, wait well past the boredom point. Once you get past that wait even longer till you are full of the fire to move.

You could try this…. this was a piece of advice I read recently to someone who was suffering from the early effects of adrenal fatigue (exhaustion) which, untreated, certainly can lead to inertia: Go to bed right after work on Friday night. Do not get up aside from eating until Sunday noon. You may not read, watch TV or use any electronic items, you must just lie there asleep or with your eyes closed for the full time. The person who received and acted on this advice said they felt incredible when they re-emerged into the world.

Good luck and love to hear how you get through your inertia!

This article was written by Gay Landeta with the intention of helping you to Create the Life you Want to Live! All rights reserved 2011.